Things that made my day.

Things that made my Tuesday better...

-Breakfast for lunch. Delish.

-Discovering that James married his high school sweetheart, the only girl/women that he ever dated. 26 years and still going strong!

-The sunshine.

-Driving by Guthrie and seeing all the pretty bikes. I want!

-Planning for the Lake Powell trip.

So the truth comes out

I've found it interesting how many times I've heard the following phrase over the last few days:
"I never liked him anyway."
"I could never understand what you saw in him."
"I always thought you could do so much better."

Its funny because I always thought everyone liked him. Guess not.

I hope next time, I find I guy that people don't feel this way about.
If they do, I hope they can be up front and tell me.

Weekend recap.

What a weekend. My entire life changed.

Friday I got to do a friend's hair and makeup for her. Thats always kind of fun. Then I went shopping with Suzi, thats always a fun time. Then I went home and got my heart and life ripped to shreds but Sean's evil twin. Traci came home and brought me some Gatorade which I thought was brilliant.

I couldn't sleep very well so I woke up bright and early on saturday. I talked to my mom for a bit. Once I managed to get out of bed and shower, I went to my dad's. I talked to my stepmom for a while, and that helped me out a bit. Then I became overcome with exhaustion and went to take a nap for a bit. After I woke up, I went to Happy Sumo and then shopping with Suzi. She is such an absolute doll. What a great friend. Later I went to a late dinner with my siblings, Amy and Jacquie. That turned out to be a nice distraction. Then after finding out Sean is an even bigger jerk than I ever could've possibly imagined, I went home and took a sleeping pill then passed out.

The sleeping pill turned out to be bad news because it made me sleep through my alarm and miss my work meeting at panty heaven/hell. I watched a trashy movie about breakup that made me feel better for a bit. Then after chatting with Traci for a bit, I sat down and watched the ANTM marathon on MTV. I had seen that cycle way too many times so I ended up falling asleep some more. After that, I went to my dad's for Randall's birthday dinner. There were so many people there, yet I managed to fall asleep once again. Crying that much sure takes a lot out of you. Dinner with the fam was nice. After that, I went home and watched Juno with Traci.

That was my crazy, life-changing, eventful weekend.
Hope you enjoyed my recap of it.

and the world stopped.

At least it should have.

My prediction that my world was about to come crumbling down came true on friday. I don't know what to do with myself right now. I'm so hurt, so lost, so confused.

When does it get easier?

The words wouldn't stop.

Have you ever had one of those moments where suddenly thoughts that you didn't even know you had come gushing out of your mouth?
You can't make them stop, but even as you say them, you realize that you mean every word that you're saying, even though you didn't know you felt that way until the words came out.
The words are probably going to bring you immense pain and heartache in the end, but you don't stop, the words keep coming.

I have.

...and now I can't help, but think that my world is about to come crashing down around me.



...and its all my fault